My Meaning of Self Love

Self love is something that I have always struggled with since I was a little girl. After going through abandonment issues at an early age, nobody ever taught me how to love myself. Nobody told me about self love when I was 13 going through all those weird stages trying to find my image when boys made fun of me saying I looked like a boy. Recently, Instagram memes began showing me that people actually loved themselves before they love someone else. I thought, how is that even possible??! Just when I had fallen in love with myself in my early twenties, it was taken away from me. I found myself comparing my image to others & asking why I wasn't good enough? Why was I not blessed with a curvaceous body? Why wasn't I outgoing? Why did I hold back my laughter? Why was I hiding my personality & true self under rocks? Why wasn't I good enough to be loved by society, but especially, why wasn't I good enough to be loved by the ones I loved the most? I now know that I AM ENOUGH. I am more than enough. The man who will call himself my future husband will be one lucky mf. I was mentally abused for such a long time & made to believe I was never going to be enough of a woman to be loved, to be a wife. But honey, I now see that I'm worth so much more.

My prayers go out to the girl/woman/guy/person that attempted to impersonate my image. I'm flattered that you want to be me & create a catfish Instagram account to lure men, but you have no idea how hard it has been for me to love myself. You have no idea the bs I've gone through to finally fall in love with myself, inside & out. Then, to see someone easily try to take credit for my image just to flirt with men on the internet? No. Nope. Not happening. You are not going to take away all of the hard work I've put into this. I hope that one day you learn to love yourself & not compare yourself to others, & especially not try to be someone else. Everybody is unique in their own ways. Once you tell your mind you love everything about yourself, your beauty & your flaws, I promise that through the power of the law of attraction, you are going to attract what you ask from in this world. You see, the law of attraction states that whatever energy you put out into the world is the energy you will get back. Karma. Whether it's unto others or yourself. If you're putting out negative thoughts about all of the things you hate about yourself, then that's what the world is going to see & respond to. If you have a positive mentality & admire all the little quirks about yourself, the world will see & admire it as well. It's ok to be different. Not everyone is going to like your differences, but in the end of the day, fuck what the world thinks because what you believe about yourself is all that matters. Someday you'll find the perfect someone who will love you just for who you are "tal como eres". There's nothing wrong with you, it's society that's messed up. Society has set these standards & expectations of being perfect. Screw being perfect. Love your weird self! & if the world doesn't want to accept you for who you are, then that's their loss. If you want to paint your skin blue & dress up as anime characters on the daily, then you do you boo! As for myself, I'm going to continue highlighting these cheekbones & glow everyday because that's what makes me happy.

A special thank you goes to all of my friends & followers who helped me report the impersonating account, I couldn't have done it without you!!! You all are the real MVPs.

Thanks for reading,
Cynthia 💗

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